12 Days (or Ways) of Kindness: How We Can Teach Kindness to Our Children During Christmas
A young boy and girl baking in a kitchen.
Introduction
The holiday season is a magical time of year when families come together to celebrate, exchange gifts, and create cherished memories. While the twinkling lights and festive decorations bring joy and excitement, it's essential not to forget the true spirit of the season—kindness. In a world that can sometimes seem busy and self-focused, instilling the values of empathy and compassion in our children is more critical than ever.
As parents, we eagerly anticipate the excitement in our children's eyes on Christmas Eve, knowing that soon (though for them not nearly soon enough), they'll wake up to find the things they have been wishing for ready to unwrap. But beyond the anticipation of receiving gifts, there's another kind of excitement we hope to cultivate in our children—the joy of giving. Christmas gives us a wonderful opportunity to instill kindness in our children, teaching them that the true magic of the season lies in the warmth and generosity of the heart. That truly the best gifts are found in those we give.
This Christmas, let's go on a journey to teach our little ones the art of kindness. In this article, we'll explore 12 heartwarming ways to nurture kindness in your child during the holiday season. These simple yet meaningful activities will not only bring your family closer but also spread the warmth of love and goodwill to those around you. So, let's unwrap the gift of kindness and make this Christmas truly special for your child and the world. Imagine what Christmas traditions rooted in love and kindness will do for your child’s future!
1. Volunteer Together
The holiday season is a time of giving, but giving can be so much more than just handing out wrapped toys and gadgets. One of the best ways to give is through donating our time and energy. Doing it together as a family will deepen family bonds, allow your children to witness you showing kindness, and create lasting family memories.
Ways to make the most out of Volunteering Together:
Explain Why: Explain to your child the importance of volunteering and how it can make a positive impact on the lives of others. Help them understand that volunteering is not just about donating money or toys but also about donating time and effort to help those in need. Sharing stories of how volunteer experiences have impacted your life can be meaningful.
Give them a choice in where to volunteer: Take some time to research local opportunities to volunteer. Look for places that align with your child's interests and your family values. Some places to consider are local food banks, animal shelters, or nursing homes.
Follow up: Later, talk about your experience with your child. Here are some questions that could start a good conversation:
How did you feel while volunteering?
What was your favorite part of helping today?
Did anything surprise you during our volunteer work?
Can you share a story or moment that stood out to you?
How do you think our volunteering made a difference?
What did you learn?
How can we show kindness in our daily lives, even when we are not volunteering?
What would you like to say to those we helped today if you had the chance?
2. Create a Kindness Advent Calendar
Advent recognizes the days leading up to Christmas, the day we recognize God giving the gift of Christ to the world. As you move closer to Christmas, consider creating a kindness Advent Calendar where each day you plan to do something kind as a family. Many advent calendars give small toys or candy, which kids love to get, but those treats are often forgettable. Instilling kindness is a lifelong gift you can give your children. This will not only build anticipation for Christmas but also highlight the joy of giving back to others, making the holiday season even more intentional.
Ways to make the most out of your family's Kindness Advent Calendar:
Explain the Kindness Advent Calendar: Take time to sit down with your children and explain the purpose of the Kindness Advent Calendar. This is a great opportunity to discuss the importance of kindness and how our acts of kindness can help other people.
Create the calendar Together: Brainstorm ideas with your child. Ask them to think of ways you can commit to show kindness each day. Have some suggestions ready, as this can help them begin thinking in a vein of kindness. Here are some suggestions to get the ideas rolling:
Donate Toys
Write Thank-you Notes
Help a Neighbor
Make Care Packages
Feed the Birds
Visit an Elderly Neighbor
Compliment Someone
Take Food to a Food bank
Plant a Tree
Bake Treats and Deliver to Neighbors
Give Someone a Hug
3. Donate Toys and Clothes
Fostering kindness and empathy during the holiday season, while also decluttering (before Santa brings even more!), can be achieved by donating gently used toys and clothing. This may be hard for some children to consider, but it's an excellent way to practice kindness.
Ways to make the most of donating Toys and Clothes:
Let them help go through their items and choose what will be given away: This will help give them a sense of ownership in the process.
Discuss where Donations will go: If the organization you choose has a website, show your child. There may even be pictures of children smiling and playing with gifts. This will help them make the connection with the idea that their donations will directly benefit others.
Pack & deliver them together: This will allow them to have even more ownership in the process and make the experience more real. Point out the volunteers who are working and explain how they are donating their time and effort to help.
Express gratitude: Encourage your child to express gratitude for the things they have. Remind them that not everyone has the same things, and by giving, they are sharing their own gifts and blessings with others.
4. Write Heartfelt Cards
As the world becomes increasingly digital, taking time to encourage your children to use paper to create handmade cards is a beautiful way to teach kindness and the power of personal connection.
Ways to make the most of writing heartfelt cards:
Discuss the significance of kind words and gestures: Explain how something as simple as opening a card with a message of love, appreciation, or encouragement can make someone’s day and lift their spirits in an amazing way. Share a time when a card made you feel better.
Decide who you will write to: Will it be a neighbor, a teacher, a friend, another family member, or a nursing home resident?
Help them know what to write by providing prompts like these:
“You are special to me because…”
“I appreciate you for…”
“Thinking of you brings a smile to my face.”
“You make the world a better place.”
“Wishing you joy, love, and happiness.”
5. Bake and Deliver Treats
Baking cookies and other goodies just make it feel like the holiday season has arrived. Make it even more special by making a tradition of baking some of the treats for others. And of course, make some extra for all the taste testers!
How to make the most of baking and delivering treats:
Include the kids in the baking process: Pull up stools to the counter and allow them to take turns measuring, mixing, and shaping. If you have time before delivery, this is a great time to snap some pictures of the kids baking that can be handed out with the treats (just don’t add the ones where they are picking their noses!)
Place the treats in tin cans or Tupperware containers: Add a bow, a special message, and the pictures if you were able to take any.
Deliver them together: Watch your kids and those receiving the treats smile!
Save some treats for when you return home: As you enjoy them together, talk about the experience and how that act of kindness made them feel.
6. Visit a Nursing Home
The holidays are such a joyous time, but it can also be a hard, lonely time for some. Some who live in nursing homes have no family or friends who visit, making a time that should be filled with joy and love a time of great sadness. By taking time to visit, you are allowing your children to bring joy into someone’s life, giving them a chance to practice kindness, and providing an opportunity for intergenerational bonding.
How to make the most of your visit to a nursing home:
Research Nursing Homes: Start by researching nearby nursing homes to find out if they have visitation programs or welcome volunteers.
Teach Respect and Compassion: Explain to your child the significance of being respectful and compassionate during the visit. Encourage them to prepare questions or topics to discuss with the residents.
Prepare Thoughtful Cards: Consider preparing cards to take with you, including both faith-specific and generic holiday cards, to leave with the residents as a respectful gesture.
7. Make Care Packages
Creating care packages is a wonderful and heartwarming way to teach kindness and generosity. You could choose to help the homeless, support the military, or contribute to organizations like Operation Christmas Child, which sends their iconic shoebox care packages to kids all over the world.
How to make the most of creating care packages:
Explain the purpose of the care package to your child: If it is a care package for the homeless, discuss the specific challenges someone who is unhoused may face and how a care package could provide them with much-needed essential items. If it is a care package for military personnel, highlight their great sacrifice and the importance of showing appreciation.
Pick appropriate items: When creating a care package for the homeless, consider items such as non-perishable food, bottled water, hygiene products (toothbrush, toothpaste, soap), socks, gloves, blankets, and a handwritten note or card with words of encouragement. For military care packages, consider including snacks, magazines, personal care items, and letters expressing appreciation.
Research organizations that accept and distribute care packages: Be sure to read their specific recommendations and/or requirements.
8. Create Handmade Gifts
Handmade gifts top store-bought ones every time! Putting in time and personal effort to create a gift is an extra level of kindness that has the power to brighten the recipient's day.
How to get the most from making handmade gifts:
Discuss the joy that giving a handmade gift can bring to someone: Help them understand that what makes the gift special is not its monetary value but the thought, time, and love that went into its creation.
Encourage your child to think about how they can make the handmade gift personal: Is there something the person is interested in or something they really like that can be included in the gift to make it even more special?
9. Participate in a Giving Tree Program
A wonderful way to practice kindness with your kids is to participate in a giving tree program, sometimes called Angel Tree. Organizations have different focuses and operate in their ways. Some organize to provide gifts for children with incarcerated parents, while others do so for a more general focus on kids. These initiatives typically involve trees or displays where you can find tags or ornaments representing gift wishes from children or families in need. These wishes may include clothing, toys, or other essential items. You and your child can select a tag, shop for the requested gift, and return it, ensuring that children in need receive something special during the holidays.
How to get the most from a Giving Tree Program:
Do Research: Research local organizations that host a giving tree and select which one you and your family want to participate in.
Involve your child: Allow your child to help in the process of selecting tags from the giving tree.
Talk about kindness: As you shop for the items together, talk about the impact of their kindness and how it can bring joy to another child’s life.
10. Start a Practice of Gratitude
Practicing gratitude may sound like an odd way to show kindness, but it may be one of the most powerful acts of kindness to oneself. When your child practices gratitude, it can foster joy and peace within them. It can be a catalyst for genuine empathy for others and a desire to show kindness. It is easy to focus on the things we lack in life while missing the many blessings right in front of us. Practicing gratitude every once in a while is beneficial, but the more often you do so, the better the benefits on your mood and outlook will be. Instilling a thankful heart in your child will be a blessing of kindness to them and to the people around them for the rest of their lives.
How to get the most from a practice of gratitude:
Talk about gratitude: Discuss with your child how important it is to have a spirit of thankfulness.
Name what you you are thankful for: Tell you child things you are thankful for in life. Encourage your child to name things for which they are thankful.
Who can you thank?: Ask if there is anyone they want to express gratitude toward and encourage them to do so. They can say thank you in person, over the phone, or by writing a note. Let them choose how they want to do so.
Start a Gratitude Journal: Consider starting a gratitude journal where your child can write or draw things daily they are thankful for. Allowing them to pick out their journal or even make one of their own will increase their excitement for the practice.
11. Share Stories of Kindness
A great way to encourage kindness in our children is by bringing examples of kindness to the forefront of their minds. Take time regularly to share stories of kindness. It can be examples of their own kindness or encourage them to think of times they witnessed someone else showing kindness, either to them or to someone else. Reflecting on kindness in this way, how it made them feel, and the impact it had will help them see how important and powerful acts of kindness can be in others' lives.
How to get the most from stories of kindness:
Pick a regular time: Have regular times when you share stories of kindness from the day. Maybe it is during dinner or right before bedtime. Having a regular time will bring intention to those moments and create a habit of looking for kindness and, hopefully, seeking opportunities to be kind.
Look for kindness in stories, shows, and movies: As you read books or watch TV together, be on the lookout for examples of kindness. Challenge your child to look for them and point them out as they see.
12. Model Kindness:
One of the greatest ways your child can learn kindness is by seeing it in action from you. Find ways to model kindness toward your child and toward others. They learn from our words, but they also learn from our actions, and they don't miss a thing. When they witness us living lives of compassion and kindness, they will naturally pick up a habit of kindness as well.
How to get the most from Modeling Kindness:
Seek opportunities to show kindness: Actively seek out opportunities to demonstrate kindness, both toward your child and others in your daily life. This could be as simple as helping your child with their homework, comforting them when they're upset, or showing empathy and patience when they make mistakes. Your child will notice and absorb these acts of kindness, internalizing them as part of their behavior. In addition to interactions within the family, show kindness to others outside your immediate circle. This can include acts of generosity, such as donating to charities, volunteering in your community, or helping neighbors in need. When your child sees you extending kindness beyond the family, it reinforces the idea that kindness should be a fundamental aspect of how they interact with the world.
When you are less than kind, use that as an opportunity for growth: No one is perfect, and there may be times when you fall short of demonstrating kindness. When this happens, use it as an opportunity for growth and learning. Apologize to your child if you've been less than kind and explain why your behavior was not ideal. This shows your child that even adults make mistakes and that acknowledging those mistakes is an essential part of personal growth and kindness. Having open discussions about moments of unkindness also allows you to model another critical aspect of kindness—empathy and self-awareness. You can share how you felt in that moment and discuss strategies for handling similar situations better in the future. By addressing these instances candidly, you teach your child that kindness is a continuous journey, and everyone has the capacity to improve.
Conclusion:
For our family we are trying very hard to be intentional with the short amount of time we have with our kids. We want to use that time give them unforgettable memories and the tools they will need in adulthood. Their capacity to show compassion and kindness is very important to us, so we are working to be very intentional in helping them to be kind. This comes through talking, modeling, and practicing in our everyday lives. What better time of year to practice kindness than Christmas!